Archive for the ‘zpdk’ Category

Running, it’s still ugly

I complain, I bitch, I moan, and yes, there are tears, but here I am again, running.

Snotty, Deborah, and Dan

We all learned from Zombieland that rule 1 is Cardio.  Sadly, that skinny little zombie apocalypse survivor started out with taller, and shall we call them, more athletic genes.  I spent Saturday internally hating genetics.  I mentioned to Deborah my newly fueled hate was toward my short genetics and she said, “ah, the hate that lasts a lifetime.”

This conversation happened during a 1/2 mile span.  It’s difficult to hate, talk, breath and run.

After the running, I got a massage!  My massage school buddies were out fulfilling part of their Specialty Massage Class requirements!  You should have seen the look of shock on their faces when they saw me.  Oh, not because I was there, I’m always showing up unexpectedly.  No, they were shocked because they thought I was running the full Kalamazoo Marathon.

Yeah, uh, no.  2 miles of sort of running is enough to make me cry, no marathon for me.  As it turns out, without a shovel, I am zombie fodder.

As for knitting, I continue to do what I call knitting.  You know, start something, work diligently on it for a week, then chuck it behind the chair.

Currently behind the chair is a baby sweater with no arms, a really short afghan (like a blanket, not a short person from Afghanistan) plus a super small start to the Chaos Swirls knit along shawl that the ZPDK have embarked on.  I embarked too, but I’m currently using a life boat.

Cub Camp-ADVENTURE! Always with the ADVENTURE

I said Cub Scout Camp kicked my butt.  It did.  But it was a riot!
 

This is Pig 2 on day 3.  Only a riotous good time leads to feet this dirty.  Well, unless you’re getting a pedicure.

Pig 2 and I were serious archery fans.  Sadly, my boy archer (stress the boy part) was not at camp this year.  Oh, beardy youth, I hope you find your Mrs. Robinson.

Although Pig 2 had all fun, I had to put some of my skills (z) to use.

First, I used my back of the head eyeballs.  With them I saw some unauthorized whittling.  Yes, a knife and a firebowl skit-a-thon do not mix.  Of course, when they do mix, an injury will occur.

Then I got to use my EMT skills, again, and again…

Anyone remember my brand new buff?  I got it to help during the awkward stages of growing out my hair.  Yes, we all know it CAN be used as a tube top, but it really works best as a head covering.  Sadly, while the blood was flowing out of a Cub Scout I reminded myself of this “Now available with this style of UV Buff®, Polygiene®, an anti bacterial, anti odor technology.

Polygiene, eh?  That sounds like “cleans up easy, even bloody messes, real good.”  I think that mental tagline was actually written by Zoolander, but hey, he’s real pretty. (The Ogre notes that the Zoolander Special Collector’s edition should be called the Special Collector’s Blue Steel Edition.)

So, stopped the blood flow and passed scout off the the Medic “Puddin’.”  The Scout required no stitches, but holy hell, did he end up with a mess o’ butterfly bandages.

Fish hook in finger?  Sure, I got a band aid for that.

Fall, or get hand caught in a door?  Really, I am first aid ready.

The only thing I don’t carry in my back pack is ice.  But if you need a plastic bag to place ice in, I’ve got you covered.

See that back pack…it could save your life-Also representin’ ZPDK and Wonder Why Alpaca Farm!

 

Besides using the skills I brought to camp, I also learned a few new things.

More plastic bags, bandaids, and Bandannas instead of fancy buffs would be awesome for next year.  I also made a note that I need rope, I can’t recall what for, and I made this note “can someone get me a fricking roll up mattress for my birthday?  My back is killing me.” I wrote that in the middle of the night.

Another lesson learned.  Bringing knitting is smarter than bringing a book.

  “whatcha readin?” 

I could have said the Anarchist’s Cookbook.  I decided that no one really cared, they just thought it was anti social to be reading.

Cub Crafts.  It’s  CUB CRAFTS, not my Dad gets to criticize my hammering skills.  Who cares if it’s not perfect.  It’s not yours, it’s your CUB’s.  Let him learn. 

Dudes take more photos than I do.  Really.  I wonder if they scrapbook too?  We could totally have a beerfest scrapbook event.

Some of that sounds snarky.  But really, I look forward to camping with my Scouts.  They learn about themselves, make great friends, develop self esteem, and become better people for it.  They don’t know that when they’re at camp, but later, later, it’s just all Stand by Me, without the dead body, and I’m glad I get to be a part of it.

Spinsanity “true friends are those still willing to sit next to each other after picking enough trash to make us cry”

Love you ZPDK!  Camp is the only other place that feels like friends.

Wordless 4th…You figure it out.

Me, dumb? Yes.

In a lame attempt to get healthy, I started taking my daily vitamin.  Yes, yes, it was a first step.  Next I added 2 giant calcium pills, because apparently I’m low on making vitamin companies rich.  Alas, I also restarted the fish oil tabs.  What the hell?  Fish oil tabs! I think I’d just better start exercising.

In the Zombie Prom Date Knitters realm, we’ve put down the shovels, and started the Haven Hat Hoopla.

In normal Knit with Snot fashion, I decided to knit a shawl instead.  Then I thought I was going to run out of yarn, so I added another color.  That looked like crap.  So, I continued knitting it until my wrists hurt.  You know, trying to see if it would look better.  No, it just looked like a larger pile of crap.

The moral to this story:  Make a damn hat.

Again with the fun. Fun is tiring.

What does a Wonder Why Alpaca Farm intern do after a long day of tackling alpaca?  Why, go to the Blue Dolphin of course!! Cheese was caught a flame, along with napkins, great food was eaten, good friends showed up.  Only one zombie had to be slayed, but it was in the parking lot, so our dinner was uninterrupted.

 Fat Cat has all the good photos and details.  You should have seen her attack that zombie with flaming cheese!
The following day was supposed to be a relaxing day of hanging out and visiting with friends.  It was, but it was hot at the coffee shop, so we retreated to the awesome dungeon atmosphere of my basement.
Are you kidding?  Me with a dreary dungeon?  Even my basement is full of adventure.  We call the paint job “1950’s Dream of the Future.”  We had planned on putting the pi around the room in the border part, but we lost ambition somewhere along the way.  Same with the weight bench.  I was supposed to be totally buff by now.  I think the knitting and cookie eating may be getting in the way of that too.
Spinny doing what she does best…Spinning!
WARNING! If you come to a Zombie Prom Date Knitter event, you may have a spindle and some fluff thrown at you.  Really, this isn’t a bad thing, as long as you’re a good catch.  We only have 1 eye patched spinner in our group. 
As you know, for me spinning took a year of secret practicing.  FatCat, she caught that spindle, and developed a bad case of SPINNING MADNESS!!!
FatCat and her first spinning lesson-Note I am no where near this event
SHOE IN!
You know, not a single one of the camera bearing members of ZPDK managed to get a group photo.  But I did get this shoe in! shot.  Which is a ZPDK tradition.
When we finally released our friends from the basement dungeon, FatCat and I decided to make dinner for the Ogre and 3 little Pigs.
Yes, we took them promptly to the Long Branch Saloon
You’ve got a baby, in a bar.
Here Pig1 decided Fatcat was ok, and finally talked to her.  I believe it was her knowledge of seafood that made him a lifelong friend.
Knitting?  Fatcat and I came up with many grand plans that involved tanks, elk, granny squares, and general mayhem.  Sadly, we didn’t get around to it.

Is that sheared or shorn?

Wonder Why Alpaca Shear Day…
You may wonder, and you may wonder why, but if you are at a shear day, you better get ready. Ready to work, or eat, or watch.  Really, there is a spot for everyone.
Chrysler and Spinsanity-The Alpaca Nurses
Besides having donuts at the farm by 8am, Chrysler and Spinsanity got the vaccinations ready for the alpaca.  Not sure, but I’m thinking it was dewormer stuff. (very scientific, I know)
After an alpaca is caught, it must then be tipped.  Ok, not like cow tipping.  This is a controlled process that went something like this
Jim: “You got the head?” 
Me: “uh?”
Jim: “Ok, GO!”
Leg sweep, leg sweep, steady weird alien head, and she’s down.
The she being referred to is me.  Ass over tea cart.  Or ass over alpaca depending how you look at it.
Katie was shearing for the Wonder Why Farm.  Sadly, her assistants were the ZPDK team…
How many ZPDKs does it take to take a boot off?  3 and one to take photos!
How many to put up a shade shelter? ALL, even the photographer.
We learned pretty quickly though.  We had too!  18 animals, 2 llamas, and the cats.   
Shear belly=garbage
Shear body=GOOD
Shear Legs=2nds
Shear neck=Good
Chin, lower legs=Texas rug
Move quick, stay out of shearers way, have bags and shots ready, for the love of all things fluffy-Do NOT let the alpaca think you aren’t paying attention!  One relaxed hand, or wipe of a snotty nose the alpaca would try to take advantage and get away.  How it thought it was going to get away while attached to a stripper pole, I don’t know.  But what I do know is it would totally mess up it’s hair cut.
Shearing can be done by hand with these giant scissors, but Sunshine was just getting a topknot trim 
Shots are given after the shearing, toe nails are clipped during, then the big reveal…Naked Alpaca!!
 
Beware of their cuteness! Aliens…ATTACK!
Now when you wonder why the alpaca roving, yarn or sweater costs more than other fibers…you’ve got a bit of an idea what goes into it. Fun, friendship,hard work, sweat, and snot.

Adventure? Always and Often + FatCat Crochet