Archive for the ‘zombies’ Category

Running, it’s still ugly

I complain, I bitch, I moan, and yes, there are tears, but here I am again, running.

Snotty, Deborah, and Dan

We all learned from Zombieland that rule 1 is Cardio.  Sadly, that skinny little zombie apocalypse survivor started out with taller, and shall we call them, more athletic genes.  I spent Saturday internally hating genetics.  I mentioned to Deborah my newly fueled hate was toward my short genetics and she said, “ah, the hate that lasts a lifetime.”

This conversation happened during a 1/2 mile span.  It’s difficult to hate, talk, breath and run.

After the running, I got a massage!  My massage school buddies were out fulfilling part of their Specialty Massage Class requirements!  You should have seen the look of shock on their faces when they saw me.  Oh, not because I was there, I’m always showing up unexpectedly.  No, they were shocked because they thought I was running the full Kalamazoo Marathon.

Yeah, uh, no.  2 miles of sort of running is enough to make me cry, no marathon for me.  As it turns out, without a shovel, I am zombie fodder.

As for knitting, I continue to do what I call knitting.  You know, start something, work diligently on it for a week, then chuck it behind the chair.

Currently behind the chair is a baby sweater with no arms, a really short afghan (like a blanket, not a short person from Afghanistan) plus a super small start to the Chaos Swirls knit along shawl that the ZPDK have embarked on.  I embarked too, but I’m currently using a life boat.

Randomly, I found a Contractor

So I go into this Construction Place* and scared the crap out of the lady there.  No, I wasn’t all in my zombie slaying garb, and I wasn’t acting assertive like I do at 4 way stops.

She was just surprised I was there. She was all “ok, what do you want?”  I said “construct, build or design a 4th bedroom on our house.”   That my friend, is not what they do.  They only work in commercial construction.   I laughed and said “oh, then can you build a pole building in my back yard to keep my kids in?”  She asked me what size I needed.

Then random other guy popped his head out and he was all “I’ve got what you need.”  Sadly, that Biz Markie song has been in my head ever since.

His relative does residential construction and he gave me the info for Construction Place.* This is how I get stuff done, completely randomly.

If you’d like to offer random suggestions, as you can see, I’m open to them.

 

*Names were changed to protect the Construction Places.

Chili, it brings out the Zombies

Saturday, was the Vicksburg…

Ice Festival and Chili Cook-off

This event has also been referred to as the “People in Vicksburg are standing WAAAY too close to guys with chainsaws.  Oh, and they are standing in the middle of the road” annual event*.

Of course we were there!

Pig 1 was totally representing his Scout Pride.  Or duty to the scouts.  I’m new to this whole boy scout thing, but I’m pretty positive he wasn’t being reverent.

Pig 2 was enjoying the cocoa, while Pig 3 was hanging out in front of the Village Hideaway.

I love the Hideaway.  It’s so not hidden, and it’s on the main drag.  Ah, the Hideaway.

Back to the event-why are there no photos of me?  I had just raided a zombie nest behind Apple Knockers, our local ice cream joint.  I was a horrible mess of chili, zombie parts, and well, a chocolate malted.  Yes, even covered in parts and bits I still had to have a malted.  They’re that good.

Oh, yeah, they also serve chili. So with that, did I talk you into visiting the Chili cook off next year?
*Actually Vicksburg has at least 2 annual “standing in the middle of the road” events.  But, this has the distinction of being the winter one.

More Knit Famous in 2011

The Ogre heard there was a huge, I mean HUGE, zombie outbreak at the mall.  So of course, we had to go check it out.  For the record, Sears is where you want to go to stock up on your zombie slaying equipment.  I was never so proud as when Pig 3 slammed a hunch backer in a front loading washing machine.  It’s totally cool, because now the washer has slight damage and will be sold at a discounted price.

While at the mall having our adventures, which included a dance party, a dance fight, and a new belt, I saw an amazing thing.  YES!  Something more amazing than Pig 3 and the washer!  A lady walked by wearing what appeared to be a hand knit hat.  I looked closer and thought “hey, that’s the Hurricane Hat pattern!

“HEY!  That is my hat!!!”

She was stylishly wearing hers inside out.  Or, I didn’t weave in all the ends and she was hiding them.

I picked the wrong week to stop…

It’s like The One with the Embryos episode of Friends.  Oh, crikey, you know, the one with the QUIZ that leads to the apartment swap.  No, I’m not talking about “Every week the TV Guide comes to Chandler and Joey’s apartment. What name appears on the address label?”  (Chanadler Bong)  I’m referring to “What is Rachel’s favorite movie?”  Rachel claims Dangerous Liaisons is her favorite movie; her real favorite movie: Weekend at Bernie’s.”

So here we go. I claim that Gone with the Wind is my favorite movie, but it is any one of these:

Point Break-The best lines ever, an accidental comedy!!  “I’m not going to paddle to New Zealand.”

Shaun of the Dead-Wait, more awesome to quote! “Don’t say the zed word.”  “The ‘Batman’ soundtrack?” “Throw it.”

But most possibly, my all time favorite is……..   ……….   …………

Airplane! There are so many great quotes.  I probably quote one a day.  It’s sick.  I haven’t even seen this movie since the 80’s.

JOEY: And he says that lots of times, you don’t even run down court. And that you don’t really try… except during the playoffs.
ROGER MURDOCK (Kareem)[breaking character] The hell I don’t! LISTEN KID! I’ve been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA. I’m out there busting my buns every night. Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes.

Just Monday I said “I picked the wrong week to stop drinking””…smoking” “… sniffing glue.”

CLASSICS!!!

Plus, every time one of the Pigs get Boy’s Life, I wonder “where the hell is my Nun’s Life??”

So, tell me, what is your socially acceptable favorite and your real favorite?

A Winter Poem

Zombies frozen in the field

Warmed by the winter sun,

they move a bit each day.

Will they reach the house?

No, I’ve got my shovel.

Sometimes I look like this.  Mostly when I’m doing my super awesome embodiment of Grace, Grange duties.  Look how funky fresh I look in that dress, yo!

 

I may even be all respectful at some times-but it doesn’t last…

Because really, you’ve got to defend what you believe in.

“NO WHITE SHOES AFTER LABOR DAY!!!”

 

On football day, I have been known to be optimistic, and a wee bit on the “awh, hell no ref! That is bullshit!” side.

 

 

Now sometimes, I just need to beat the shit out of stuff.  Most of the batting cages are closed, so now, I’ve got to do the best I can.  NO closets are safe!!  You will bow down to my organization!!

 

 

Glad to be back!!  Here’s to many more adventures!!