Bon Jour!

I’m back. I’ve got a foul mouth, and a low tolerance for princesses. The only Disney princess worth saving is Belle and technically, she is neither a princess, nor savable, she saves her damn self.

I bet she knits too. I bet she knits crappy, she doesn’t have time for perfection! Also, she has a beast, I bet she knits with SNOT!!

Now, back to whatever it is a do regularly…

Ok, we had a blast. But some of my favorite parts were mean.

1. Dad called his daughter, in full $80 princess dress “Princess”. Daughter age 5, took swig of soda, gargled it and yelled “I’m no Princess! I’m a ruddy Pirate!!” True. I almost peed.

2. On Nemo and friends ride, another princess screamed bloody murder. I couldn’t help but laugh.

3. Nose picking in princess dresses. Priceless.

and number 4…

3 year old boy pissing on a tree while we walked to the mono rail. Who says there is no spontaneity at Disney.

Favorite Rides

1. Expedition Everest…even the time it broke down and we got walked off. It was like a behind the scenes ride!

2. Fantasmic-I wanted the villains to win.

3. Phillharmagic. That crap cracks me up! If you ever get a chance to sit next to Pig 2 during that, pure actual joy laughter.

4. Jungle Cruise-I would love to be a skipper on that ride. Look, the back side of water…O2H. Funny stuff.

5. All of Epcot.

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