Great Day!! Rare, but Awesome

We had the best day yesterday! We went grocery shopping, and there was minimal fighting, and I didn’t cry at the check out lane. No, not from spending a small fortune to feed 3 pigs and an Ogre, but from being beat down by begging fighting and whining.

I also did not yell, which for me is a huge improvement. Oh, no, not at the pigs, they can tear apart Meijer, I don’t care. I hate the constant battle over bagging my groceries. I was planning to just always bring my own bags, but that really does cause more trouble than it’s worth at Meijer, and with the pigs, it’s one battle I don’t need to wage, especially in front of them. I hate dragging the halberd out in front of them. It’s so heavy to carry that thing and push them and a cart full of groceries.

So I they didn’t fight, I taught them how to chat up cute cashiers (a very useful skill) and I didn’t yell, or pull weapons on anyone. Did I ever tell you that I did pull a weapon on the Ogre on our first date? Knife, big knife, before I got in the car with him. I also informed him I knew how to use and that although I was smaller than him, I could take him out.

Right, good times at the grocery. Blah, blah, supposed to be cleaning, instead having summer fun in the yard. When do normal people clean?? Also, I am over 30, where the hell am I supposed to by clothes? Everything is too young and hooker-y, business casual, or big cleavage grandma. I need like the small cleavage, easy care hip mother of three but wants to look tidy saving the world for Al Gore in renewable resources line of clothing. Where’s that store? Probably next to the Normal People Cleaning Supply Store. Yeah.

Ok, then in an extreme act of bravery, gold medal act here, I took all three pigs, ages 3, 5, and 7, to the movie theatre. BY MYSELF. Thank you, thank you. This was after I let them stay up until 11 on the 4th playing with totally legal in Michigan fireworks, and they were not one bit whiney or tired. No sir. We even got to the movie an hour early (ooops) and had to kill time at the mall. All awesome.

Ratatouille was fun. I think I liked it more than the boys. PK’s family before deciding to be Arkansas hillbillies were actually from France. So even in cartoon form, I have secret little girl longing of having French family snobbery. I just completely ignore the shotguns in every corners of their shacks part and skip right back to shacks in France. It just sounds nicer in France. Better cheese.

As I was getting my PJ’s on and looking back on what a great day the pigs and I had and was making plans for the rest of the summer, I noticed that my underwear were on inside out. How could I wear my underwear inside out on such a great day? Actually, maybe my day was great because they were inside out, and who’s to say that I didn’t put on today’s pair inside out to test this great day theory out? Ok, they are totally on inside out.

No, the darn (ha) socks aren’t done. Harry informed me yesterday that I have 2 days to finish them. Uh, looks like I am going to work on them at swim class.

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4 responses to this post.

  1. Tell him the socks are for when the book comes out, not the movie. :-)You are so brave. I have yet to take mine to a movie. It’s not a bad idea next week when it will be even hotter. I might try it, but I’m not all that brave.

    Reply

  2. Oh my gosh! I am so insensitive to people who live on hills,are named billie, own shotguns, are related to me, have more than 3 kids,work at Meijer, the state of Arkansas (which, really, who named that?) and the whole bloody country of France! Don’t forget people who don’t believe in luck. Also, this isn’t an apology, probably just poor spelling, grammar, and more snottiness.

    Reply

  3. OMG!! Tim and I are sitting here laughing our hiney’s off….. And…man do we miss you guys!!

    Reply

  4. I miss you guys too!!!! Ahhh, I’m gonna cry! We moved here because of you 😦

    Reply

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